"Allo Allo" by Encore Performing Arts.

Duchess Theatre, Long Eaton.

Ok, pay attention as I'll post this only once!!

Based on the hugely successful British television series, which ran for seven seasons, this very funny comedy tells of the adventures of the
hapless cafe owner, Rene, in occupied France. He and his tone deaf wife, Edith, have stashed a priceless portrait stolen by the Nazis in a sausage in their cellar, where two British airmen are also hiding until the Resistance can repatriate them. 

Communications with London using the wireless, that is disguised as a cockatoo, add to the many embarrassments Rene and his staff endure in the company of his patrons. News that the Führer is scheduled to visit the town inspires tricksters disguised as Hitler to frequent the cafe. Meanwhile, Rene summons all the wit he can muster to save his café and his life.

It's not that often that you hear an entire theatre roar with laughter, and when I say "roar" I really do mean full on belly laughs, but this packed Duchess Theatre was rocked with laughter. That is partly due to the instantly recognisable characters, the wonderful script, which is completely politically incorrect, and partly due to the cast's comedy skills.

Christopher Grantham plays René and completely embodied every mannerism that Gordon Kaye, who of course played the original Rene, had put in place for the TV series. A massively nuanced performance, and if you squinted, you'd have thought it was Kaye on stage, such was the whole resemblance of this classic comedy character, as well as perfecting that faux French accent perfectly.

Angela Plant plays Edith, Rene's wife whose out of tune "singing" was in full evidence in the stage play. It's very evident that every actor, many of whom would not even had been born when this show was puling in the TV viewers, have scrutinised their TV characters and perfected everything as close to impersonation as you can get, while still managing to retain some of their own DNA in the roles.

Mariko Jones plays Yvette; the head waitress in Cafe René. She is passionately in love with René. Vicki Michelle, who originally played Yvette was very physical in appearance and character, and Mariko is a perfect piece of casting.

Emma Collins plays Michelle; Michelle is one of the few regular female characters who appears resistant to René's charms, though she is willing to pretend an interest on occasion, to get him to do what she wants. 

Sian Scattergood Grantham, who I had to look twice at, plays Mimi. Sian just seemed to have morphed into Mimi, who is a fire cracker of a role to play, and this cracker of an actor delivered a fiery Mimi.

Abbi Burns and Maria Lawrence play the RAF Airmen, who we only got to see a few times, often in the background, but their stiff upper lip delivery and false moustaches brought the house down when they did appear.

Stuart Bull plays Officer Crabtree; Crabtree is a British policeman who is posted in France. He is known for his bicycle and terrible French. The thing about all of these characters is that, as soon as the characters appear, the audience know exactly who they are and know the scripts and the catch phrases. Stuart may well have had the hardest job with the script because it's not easy to say something wrong than it is to say things correctly. It's like a pianist playing all the wrong notes, or a good singer singing out of tune, and with the amount of mispronunciations Crabtree has to deliver, Stuart's script could not have been easy to digest, but he didn't mispronounce any mispronunciations. 

Gabryl Oleshko plays Herr Flick, another actor who just seems to morph into the role, even down to the naturalistic gammy leg walk. There's a scene where Helga has to help Flick on with his trousers after Flick's workout which didn't quite go to the script, but Gabryl completely styled it out with an adlib, and still completely in character. Something you probably didn't see before Friday's performance or will see on either of the Saturday performances. How he managed to keep a straight face throughout, I'll never know. We also get to see Gabryl's fiddling talents as well.

Kheenan Jones plays General Von Schmelling who oozed authority, especially with that wonderful booming voice and accent.

Harvey Latter plays Lieutenant Hubert Gruber, who has a bit of a crush on Rene. Gruber turned up at just the wrong moment every time the comedy had Rene and Crabtree in an embarrassing situation, and the look of glee on Harvey's face was joyful to see. Harvey's face was a picture and I was just waiting for him to crack, as he looked like he wanted to smile but didn't; or maybe it was just Gruber's lascivious leering, who knows? 

Steve Dunning plays Colonel Von Strohm; The Colonel is the corrupt town commandant who likes to line his own pockets with stolen Nazi treasures, like the picture of the fallen Madonna with the big boobies. 

Hayley Wood plays Helga; She is the secretary of Colonel Kurt Von Strohm. She works for Captain Hans Geering and Lieutenant Gruber too, but is also very loyal to Herr Otto Flick. Helga is a saucy little minx, as shown by her disrobing scene. Hayley is a fabulous character actor, as are all of the cast.

Tom Allmark plays Captain Alberto Bertorelli; An Italian Captain. He is self-proclaimed lover of many women and has a particular fondness for Helga. Wonderfully over the top accent and a wonderfully over the top character, one that I am sure Tom loved bringing to life on the Duchess stage.

Terry Stevenson plays the wonderfully eccentric LeClerc.

The French Peasants are played by Tom Preston, Angela Walters, Ron Frost and Becky Street, who we saw adorning the tables of Rene's establishment.

There are so many brilliant characters in the TV sitcom, and they gave the above actors shine time on stage, and highlighting what excellent comedic actors this troupe are.

Directed by Adam Guest, and anyone who knows Adam, knows that his flair of comedy is second to none. Whether that be as a performer or Director, Adam, who is also the Producer, has created a monster of a comedy stage production; just the audience reactions show what a massive success this show is. I've known Adam for over a decade now and have yet to find an end to his talents, he can even play the typewriter! I've seen him perform it live.

This show has characters popping out from all over the set and the auditorium and keeping them all clocked is Stage Manager Katie Bird. Katie is also responsible for all of the props we see on stage, and I am so pleased that the food and drink used are all real. I did smile though when I learned after the show that some of the food was not quite as fresh as it looked.

The set is practically how I remember it from the TV show, and a lot of detail has been put into the design and construction, thanks to Terry Stevenson.

The costumes are also excellent thanks to Milton Keynes Theatre Of Comedy and managed by Becky Morley.

Sound design and operation is by Adam Guest - I told you that there's no end to this man's talents didn't I?

Lighting design is by David Price who also operated the lighting.

Abbi Burns also deserves a mention for the choreography involved, especially in Edith's Cabaret suite.

I very rarely mention programmes but I really must tell you about the design for this particular one. Designed by Matt Powell it takes the style of a menu that you may find in a cafe like Rene's. The inside of the menu gives descriptions of the cast as if they were a food option on the menu, which makes a real difference to your average theatre programme. I know that some theatres are thinking of doing away with physical programmes, opting for a downloadable version via a QR code, but I love a well-designed programme which not only acts as a keepsake and reminder of the show you've seen, but in this case a real work of art design wise. If they presented awards for programme designs, this would be an outright winner. Long live the physical programme.

I was brought up on a diet of TV sitcoms in the seventies and eighties that were really funny, not like most of the sitcoms on TV nowadays. Sitcoms that were not afraid to give a gentle poke at people. They gave a gentle ribbing via so many "isms" but back in the day no one took offence, but then the "fun police" were called in and all of the funniest TV shows faded out. 

This show has the ability to insult just about everyone but, as far as I could tell, everyone left with big smiles on their faces because the comedy is truly funny, and shows like these should be performed more. if something is funny, it's funny and we should not have to think about who may be insulted by a word, comment or the raising of an eyebrow.

Encore Performing Arts are not afraid to take on various taboos within entertainment, and I thank them for that. Next year they celebrate a decade of entertaining theatre audiences, and I for one am so pleased that I have seen and had the pleasure of reviewing all of the productions by the award winning Encore, and seen their popularity and talents rise, and continue to rise. Here's to the next decade and beyond ma petite cucumbers.

"Allo Allo" is at the Duchess Theatre, performed by Encore Performing Arts until Saturday 4 May, but you may need to get your tickets pretty fast as they are selling like hot sausages with a large serving of sauce on the side!! Zut Alors!